I did it!

Well, now on to the real world!

Time warps can be kind of creepy

Do you ever have one of those moments when you step outside of yourself and see the entire scene that's being enacted in front of you as a spectator and not as a participant?
I had one of those the other day.
Michael and I had just spent the afternoon baby-sitting my too precious nephew, Rylan, and Spencer and Katie had finally come home from their anniversary date. My "baby" brother picked up his son and started playing with him like I remember our own dad playing with him. He was holding tiny Rylan in one hand and swinging him back and forth, like one of those scary carnival pirate ship rides, and Rylan was giggling and smiling and loving every second...
There's no way Spencer could remember Daddy playing this game with him, he was an infant. But for a split second I was that jealous five year old little girl wanting "My" daddy to swing me around too.
It made me realize that maybe I'm not ready to be a mom. Maybe I still have a little bit of growing up to do, and I know for sure that Michael and I have a lot of "settling in" left. We have to find a place that contents us before we bring a third life into the mix. I want to build a home, not a house, a home.