Sometimes it's easier to just let it go

These last few weeks have been a learning experience for me as far as my marriage goes. I have been trying to step back more and to try to not be so doom and gloom over every harsh word and every meal eaten in silence. I have been trying to imagine my life without Michael and trying to just keep it all in perspective.
Sometimes I try to imagine the life we would have had if different decisions had been made, different paths chosen. Would we have been happy on Walnoaks Drive? Could Crossville have fulfilled our dreams? Would Kingsport have offered the stressfree life that my ovaries need to procreate? At this point, I just don't know. I've never really thought that "place" was so important. I've always kind of believed that people and family and love and togetherness, these are the things that should dictate happiness, not where you choose to lay your head at night. But maybe I am wrong, maybe a place can make a person so miserable that realizing the family and the love are still there is an impossible thing.
I want to believe that when we leave this city that our life together will be magically restored. But restored to what? I don't remember a time of romance and rainbows. I know Michael and I have always lived life well together... but it's never been a fairytale. But is any marriage? Probably, not. Again, I've probably set the bar too high, maybe I'm not giving him the chance he deserves, setting him up for failure and all of that.
All I know at this point is that sometimes it's easier to not yell back. Sometimes it's easier to just wait it out. To move on when the apology never comes, to just get up and pretend it never happened. Make breakfast, try to make conversation, and smile at the outside world.