death or taxes, i choose death

I think the expression "death and taxes" is actually referring to the only two certainties we have in this life, but I would like to change that. I think that "death and taxes" is actually referring to the fact that death is the next logical step after doing one's taxes with one's spouse. For three days.
Federal taxes are bad enough. Although, after purchasing TaxCut and inputting all the necessary information and realizing that we are getting a nice chunk of change back from Uncle Sam, much to Michael's dismay (he's one of those sick fucks who thinks it's better to break even at the end of the year because why should we loan our money to the government and all that silly nonsense.) But I digress, the federal taxes weren't so bad.
Then we get to New York State and Part-time New York City Resident taxes.
These are a bitch. And not just any bitch. The kind of bitch that you want to grab by nappy-hair-and-throw-into-a pile-of-cow-shit-while-stomping-on-her-over-made-up- whore-ass-face kind of bitch.
Four screaming fits, three door slammings, two crying spells, one apology to parents for one screaming fit while on phone with said parents, one call to NY State Tax Assistance Hotline, three forms and eight pages later we now owe NYC taxes in the amount of $887 (+ a penalty for underpayment of city taxes because Michael's company neglected to withhold city taxes from his wages.)
So, in the end the government didn't get a "free loan" from us this year. And what have we learned from this boys and girls?
H & R Block is a cheap price to pay for preserving your marriage.