Survival of the fittest

Well, my mother has come and gone and miraculously, we both survived. In fact, I think I might have actually enjoyed her visit. To her credit she behaved quite properly and to my own credit I didn't once revert back to three year old status by throwing a giant foot stomping temper tantrum over some guilt invoking comment that she made. We just had a nice, calm week together, and wile I wouldn't call it actual bonding (my mother and I will never be friends) I will say that I enjoyed having her around.
I've always been jealous of my two step-sisters and the relationship and interaction they have with my step-mom. They get together and they're best girlfriends, talking, laughing, playing... The mother-daughter bond is still there, but it goes so much farther. They truly enjoy each other and look to each other for everything. I've never had that with my own mother and unfortunately I've never really been let in to their tight bond either, I'm still the 'red-headed step child' no matter how much they say otherwise. That's the only thing about this recent mom visit that makes me sad.
I kind of thought that she would come up here, Michael would leave and she would look at me and say, "Let's have a slumber party! We'll get a bottle of wine and just talk and talk and talk..." No, she sat on the couch at night and read her book. She did talk to me, but not about her own life, no hopes or dreams or men stories, only doom and gloom about who's dying and who's sick and who's too poor to buy meat. And she didn't really want to hear about Michael and I and our lack of baby production or about my school or my dog's little accident. No, the weather was a deep enough topic of conversation.
Oh well, Michael says that's just the way she is, as does my dad. But, I don't know, it still hurts. If I can't have that bond with my own mother then what kind of bond could I ever really have with anyone? What about my own daughter, if I'm ever blessed with one? What will she think of me?